Monday, May 10, 2010

Open Letter

Dear Calder,

It's been years since our encounter, and while I've made no attempt to reach you, I've thought about you often. I imagine you may have thought about me. I speak of you to friends frequently, as they often inquire of me whether I've ever met anyone with the same name. "Only once," I tell them, "and it was pretty uncomfortable for both of us". It seemed so for you, although it may have been your age that gave me that impression. You were a camper of perhaps twelve, and I was a college-aged staff member of the camp: the disparity makes any attempt at a friendly exchange problematic, regardless of obvious common ground.

Regretfully, it's only the general tone of the encounter I remember well. We spoke, and I don't remember exactly what was said except a confirmation of our respective names. If we each explained the genesis of our own naming, I don't remember it. How was it you came by that name? The conditions which existed when I was born had not changed appreciably by the time you were, and so the name could not have gotten any more popular. Was it that your parents were devotees of Alexander Calder, as mine were? The name does appear in media from time to time, as you no doubt know.

I wonder if living as Calder has changed for you any. By the time I was your age at the time of our encounter, I had made peace with it and was beginning to appreciate it. Wanting a common name was in my past. At my age now, I wouldn't want any other name, and love my parents dearly for choosing it. It really is quite ideal, when you think about it. It can't become a disparaging nickname very easily. It may not appear on any bicycle license plates, but the appeal of having one fades, as you must surely have learned after we met. What remains is a desire to make one's distinct mark on the world, and it's all the more possible when you can't be confused with anyone.

Unfortunately, you and I will always be out there somewhere for each other, potentially diminishing each other's impact simply by existing. I don't wish for an adversarial relationship with you. Perhaps if I heard anything of you, it would ease my mind on the matter. Might you in fact be going by some distinguishable variation on the name now, or another name entirely? I would take umbrage at the implied insult to the name I take pride in, but I would also relish my renewed status as the one and only. If you read this, reach out- let's reach rapprochement before violence seems like the only recourse to one of us.

sincerely,
the original Calder

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