Cold To Hold

I have what they call a beer cozy, or what I guess you would have to just call a cozy if beer isn't your thing. It's an insulating sleeve made of foam rubber, and you slide the can into it, thus keeping it cold for longer. It's a handy device, although it makes the beer look ungainly and awkward. It just ruins the can's graceful lines altogether, but you put up with that for what kind of enhancement it provides. It's like a bicycle helmet in that regard.

I'm not entirely sure where I came by this one, although my best guess is that it fell into my possession by the kindness of a former roommate. On it in white lettering are the words "Ken & Fran", and below that is a date. Also depicted are a pair of bells. I think it must have been some kind of wedding favor given out to attendees. I don't mean disrespect to Ken and Fran, but that's kind of a lame thing to hand out, and it strikes the wrong tone as well. I guess that's just disrespectful on its face. I'm sorry.

There's something amusing about having a thing like that. Such items are practically priceless, and I love looking for them at thrift stores. It's a hell of a conversation piece, although I don't know where the conversation can go when I explain that I don't know Ken & Fran and wasn't there for their ceremony. It's fun anyway, and must be what is meant by the term "kitsch". I wish that I had more items like that to spice up the home front.

We used to have what might have been even better cozies, and they were in the form of fish. I think they were bass fish, but I couldn't say that with confidence. You inserted the can into the fish's gaping mouth. It was funny, provided you wouldn't be grossed out by your beer being in a fish's mouth, or scared that the fish would greedily drink your beer. If those said something about a special occasion for some couple I don't know, they would have been perfect.