Angry Me

I've written in the past about what I have called "checkpoint charity". It bothers me tremendously to have people looking for donations or signatures at strategic points in my neighborhood. Most commonly, they are in front of the grocery store and outside the nearest coffee shop. I hate that. I hate knowing that more often than not, I will have to walk past them and escape their pleas for my attention. I don't enjoy it. It always spoils my mood.

The other day, this guy was there by the coffee shop. Most of the time, I don't really have such trouble there. I don't know why it is, but they seem to not accost me there. Maybe they usually have their hands full when I go by, but this guy today obviously did not. I didn't see him at first, but he sprang out at me, and started off with some pitch. I really don't know what it must have been. I have no interest in knowing, as it could only make me more susceptible to know.

I walked past him without much of a look, though I did say "No thank you". I don't know what I didn't want, but I knew I didn't want it. It was awfully lucky that the walk signal I needed changed just then. It's awful to turn the person down flat, and then have to stand there by them for a while. There was no need this time. I walked right on my way to the library, though I did know that I would in all likelihood have to pass him again on my return.

There's the big bother. Having had to deal with that and then knowing it would just happen again, I just fell into a terribly foul mood. I feel guilty like anybody else about not giving or not signing or whatever it was, but I don't turn that inward. I turn it outward, in this case at that guy. I was terribly livid at him for making me say no and then feel bad. I did get to feeling better in a few minutes, but I was very unpleasant there for a bit. I hate that guy.